We again, talked about nothing in particular, not like we had in my room earlier that day. He asked me about high school and I asked him about his job. When I mentioned the fact that he was boarding and traveling like I was, however, he wasn't quick to change the topic. He looked away as he spoke, but he still talked about it, which was a big improvement on the earlier part of the day. He told me about how he traveled like I did, just drifting from town to town whenever he just didn't feel right, or when he'd just let someone go (his term for poisoning them, I came to find out in the same conversation as well). He had 2 rules: don't do it to someone who lived in the same town, and don't do it to anyone you know. I joked a little bit by saying, "Well, then I'm safe on both counts, huh?"

He grinned sheepishly and said quietly, "Well, I wouldn't have anyway, you're too important. And I'm not doing that anymore, besides."

I smiled and nodded, reaching out to hold his hand with my bandaged hand and he took it, kissing it softly and putting it back down on the table: the candlelight in the restaurant was so beautiful, it lit up his face in just the right way, and I couldn't stop staring at him the whole time. He seemed to be having just as much trouble with tearing his eyes off of me as well, because every time I looked up from the menu or from a knot I was absent-mindedly picking out of the fringe of my shawl, I was met with his piercing eyes.

The food arrived and we enjoyed it, although I have to admit, I didn't taste much of it. It was too exciting, actually being on a real date, like I was normal. No, not "like" I was normal… I was finally in control of my own mind. And I knew that was what Vann was feeling as well, because his smile and mine shared the same relief and satisfaction, and even the same anticipation for what life had in store for us now that we were back on track.

After eating our first meal as an unspoken "couple", Vann picked up the check and I invited him back to my place for some drinks, saying, "After all, we never got to the drinks we were going to have earlier this afternoon."

He smiled and laughed with the realization, "That's right…sure, I'd love to."

And we were off to my place.

**

Once we got inside my room, I locked the door behind us and turned on the small lamp, offering Vann a seat on the bed. He sat down and I went to the mini-fridge, pulling out a bottle of rum and a can of coke, kicking my shoes to get more comfortable. Moving over to the counter outside the bathroom, I switched on the radio and turned it on, The Rolling Stone's "Wild Horses" playing softly in the background as I moved. He watched me and smiled with every new thing I did, so I asked him, "What are you smiling about?"

As I poured the drinks, he replied, "It's just…you're so pretty," he stopped and cursed himself, correcting, "…beautiful… everything you do, you make it this graceful, like, dance.

I was so flattered, no one had ever paid so much attention to me that I blushed and said, "Thank you Vann… I didn't realize." And I handed him a glass, sitting down next to him, feeling his heat.

The song fit so well, I had to smile. "What?" Vann asked me.

"Nothing, it's just this song. I love this song. And it's perfect for relaxing like this with you," I said as I slid my hair behind my ears and drank a little more. By now, from the wine at dinner, the painkillers from the stitches leftover in my system from the night before, and the rum and cokes, I felt no pain. But I knew everything that was going on was under my control.

I would normally feel such anxiety: where is his hand, where are mine, what is he sitting on, am I sitting too close? But I was just so comfortable with him that it was second nature to be so close to him without a care.

He leaned in for a kiss quickly and surprised me, but it wasn't a deep kiss or anything. It was a quick kiss on the lips, lingering for a moment to catch the flavor of the wine lingering on our lips from dinner. As quickly as he leaned in, he pulled away with a little grin, like he was proud of himself.

I smiled; it was my turn to ask him, "What?"

He shrugged and nodded over to the radio and stopped before he could answer, like he was thinking as we stared at each other. I wanted to kiss him again; I wanted to just melt away with him. And he wanted that too. So as he said, distractedly, "I love this song," we did.

He leaned into me and our lips finally met like they had earlier that afternoon. But this time, it lasted a lot longer than before, and there was a gentle urgency to our movements. I instinctively took a hand and placed it on his chest as he turned his body to face me, getting more comfortable on the bed to break the kiss and begin unbuttoning my sweater. I smiled at him and giggled a little bit when his fingers trembled and messed up on one button. He looked up and joined in my nervous giggling with me, getting to the last button and leaving my sweater unbuttoned but not opened all the way, my bra peeking out underneath.

The feeling of want I had for him was almost overpowering as I reached out and began to unbutton his shirt as well. I'd never felt like this before, not even before I started getting anxious, not even with my first real boyfriends…This was completely new and all-encompassing to me. I felt my heart pounding as I opened the shirt and tugged it off of his shoulders, exposing a slightly muscled chest under a white sleeveless t-shirt, broad shoulders and strong arms. The feeling I got next was one of warmth, just warmth all over my body, concentrating in my stomach and surprisingly, slightly lower than that as well.

I closed my eyes as I rested my hand over his heart and smiled to myself as he reached up and pushed my sweater off my shoulders so that I was bearing all to him (with the exception of my bra). He traced a line from my cheek down to my neck and across my collarbone, down to my breasts and I sighed, loving the feeling it gave me. It was like this was everything I ever wanted in the world at the moment; this hunger I had was finally being satisfied.

And as Vann leaned in to kiss my lips with his hands resting on my chest, I whispered, "Would you spend the night?"

He paused and looked into my eyes, searching as he answered, "I'd love to do that."

And so he did.