Lucy woke up. Her eyesight was blurred and her head felt fuzzy. Slowly she started to take in her surroundings and realised she was in the hospital.
Lucy looked to her right side and there holding her hand but asleep in a bedside chair was Chris. Lucy thought for a moment and then it all came flooding back.
The blood, her screams, Chris finding her in the bathroom, the ride to the hospital. Doctors and Nurses and then the words "Surgical Procedure".
Lucy gave his hand a tight squeeze.Chris jumped.
"Hey, you're awake?" He whispered getting up kissing her forehead.
Lucy's eyes filled with tears and her bottom lip began to tremble.
"I've lost the baby haven't I?"
"You've miscarried yes. I'm so sorry honey."
Lucy started to cry. Chris wrapped his arms around her kissing her hair. Holding her tight.
"This is not your fault. You did nothing wrong." He told her, his voice faltering fighting back the tears. He wanted to cry with her but kept telling himself he had to be strong.
"Why?" Sobbed Lucy.
"There's no reason why."
"Everything was going so well. I was feeling great, till yesterday that is. I thought it was normal. I should have gone to the doctor's, I should have gone..."
"Lucy you are not to blame." Chris looked at her and repeated "You are not to blame."
"That doesn't make me feel any better you know?"
Lucy looked at her left hand and noticed she was attached to a drip.
"I've had surgery?"She asked
"They had to take you down to theatre just to make sure....."
"There was nothing left." Lucy finished.
"You could get an infection if there was."
"I want to go home"
"I don't think it will be tonight. Besides, we left the house in a rush this morning and well..." Chris looked to the floor. "It's in kind of a mess".
Lucy knew what he meant and she could feel the emotional pain multiplying inside her.
Lucy let go of his hand and covered her eyes, crying into them.
"Lucy I'm as upset as you with what has happened. I love you so much and it's hurting me to see you like this. I wish I could make the pain go away. You've got to stop blaming yourself cos it's gonna make you ill and I just want you better. Please..for me?"
Lucy nodded her head as if to say yes.
"I'm going to get a nurse cos you'll need to be checked over. I'll stay a little longer, then I'll go and let you get some rest."
Lucy uncovered her eyes, "I love you."
Chris bent down and kissed her "I love you back."

The Next Day

Chris brought Lucy home. They had hardly spoke during the journey.
Lucy stood on the porch and thought about the night when her friendship with Chris had taken a dramatic turn. She craved to feel that way again and she felt guilty for having such thoughts but she wanted to feel whole again and not empty like she was feeling now.
Chris joined her and Lucy swore he was having the same thoughts.
Could they ever get that feeling back??